List of quote gags

"As I always say…"

—Valerie Frizzle whenever she is about to say some wise words.

Throughout The Magic School Bus TV series duology, Valerie and Fiona Frizzle have been known to tell the students some words of wisdom that are often motivational, educational, or may or may not help them get out of whatever pickle they are in on a field trip. This has become a running gag of sorts (much like the class’s catchphrases and gags—Carlos’ call-outs, Arnold’s catchphrase, Phoebe’s comparisons between Walkerville Elementary and her old school, Dorothy Ann’s research, Jyoti’s use of big words, Valerie herself’s “get messy” variable lines, or Ralphie wondering if any sort of thing going on is “just him”) that has been used since “Gets Lost in Space.” Starting in “Wet All Over,” a variant of this gag spawned in which the sisters would quote a relative from their quite extensive family, which has been used more often than “As I always say…” to the point where Fiona adopted this as the only version of the gag she uses.

Below is a list of every quote gag that has appeared in the main TV canon, along with which sister quoted the line, which family member or friend originally said it if one did, and that family member’s relationship to the sisters if they are a Frizzle. If it is something Valerie has always said, this section is marked “Herself.”

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The Magic School Bus (1994)

Season 1

Episode	Speaker	Citation	Line
“Gets Lost in Space”	Valerie Frizzle	“As I always say, class…”	“You’re out of this world.”
“For Lunch”	Valerie Frizzle	“As I always say,”	“No guts, no digestion!”
“For Lunch”	Wanda	“Well, as I always say,”	“No chewing, no free tickets!”

Season 2

Episode	Speaker	Family member (if present)	Relationship to the sisters/speaker	Citation	Voice imitation	Line
“Butterfly and the Bog Beast”	Valerie	Herself		“As I always say…”	Normal voice	“If they can’t see you, [chuckles], they can’t eat you!”
“Wet All Over”	Valerie	Matilda	Their great aunt	“In the words of my great aunt Matilda…”	Makes voice deeper than usual	“Nooooo-ho-ho-ho-ho!!!”
“In a Pickle”	Dorothy Ann	Valerie Frizzle		“In the famous words of Ms. Frizzle…”	Received pronunciation, but with Ms. Frizzle’s inflections	“Time waits for no vegetable!”
“Getting Energized”	Mikey	Valerie Frizzle		“As the Frizz would say…”	His normal voice	“It never hurts to be prepared.”
“Out of This World”	Valerie	Her old astronomy teacher		“As my old astronomy teacher used to say…”	Voice is more soothing and calm, similar to how her normal voice sounded in Season 1	“Star light, star bright, there’s always a way to find out if you’re right.”

Season 3

Episode	Speaker	Family member (if present)	Relationship to Valerie and Fiona	Citation	Voice imitation	Line
“In the Arctic”	Valerie	Nicholas	Their great-grandfather	“As my great-grandfather Nicholas used to say…”	Santa Claus	“Ho ho ho! It can hurt a lot when the mug gets hot! Ho ho ho!”
	Valerie	Moon Valley	Valerie’s niece/Fiona’s daughter	“As my niece, Moon Valley, always says…”	Valley girl American accent	“Oh, like, for sure, for sure.”
“In the Rainforest”	Valerie	Her old flight instructor		“As my old flight instructor used to say…”	Pinches nose to sound like she’s speaking over an intercom	“Look before you leap, and never jump to conclusions!”
The Magic School Bus holiday special	Carlos	Valerie Frizzle	Current teacher at the time	“Well, as the Frizz would say…”	His normal voice	“It’s good news to reuse.”
“Behind the Wheel of the Magic School Bus”	Valerie	de Cardboard	Their great uncle	“As my great uncle de Cardboard used to say…”	Southern American accent with a gruff tone	“Whatever you throw out might one day throw you out.”

The Magic School Bus Rides Again

Trailers

Episode	Frizzle sister/other speaker	Family member (if present)	Relationship to the sisters/speaker	Citation	Voice imitation	Line
February 2017 Season 1 trailer	Fiona	Valerie Frizzle	Sister	“Well, class, as my big sister always says…” (line taken from "In the Swim")	Her normal voice	“Bus, do your stuff!” (line taken from "Pigs in the Wind"

Season 1 (Season 5)

Episode	Frizzle sister/other speaker	Family member (if present)	Relationship to the sisters/speaker	Citation	Voice imitation	Line
“Hides and Seeks”	Fiona	Adm. Antonio Bumpus Frizzmuntschauser McCorkle von Wahoo XXXIV	Their great great uncle	“Well, you know, as my great-great uncle, Admiral Antonio Bumpus Frizzmuntschauser McCorkle von Whoo-hoo!!!! the Thirty-Fourth used to say…”	Her normal voice	“Why not?”
“Three in One”	Fiona	Dr. Kin Etic	Her old teacher	“As my old teacher, Dr. Kin Etic, used to say…”	Sings an EDM-sounding tune	“Everything’s always moving, moving, moving!”

Season 2 (Season 6)

Episode	Speaker	Family member (if present)	Relationship to Valerie and Fiona	Citation	Voice imitation	Line
“Nothin' but Net”	Fiona	Great Uncle ASCII	Their great uncle	”Well, as my great uncle ASCII used to say…”	Robotic, almost AI voice/text-to-speech sounding	“01111001 01100101 01110000.” (Converted to ASCII: “Yep.”)

Season 3 (Season 7)

Episode	Speaker	Family member (if present)	Relationship to Valerie and Fiona or the speaker	Citation	Imitation	Line
“In the Zone”	Maven	Valerie Frizzle	Maven’s cousin	“Cousin Valerie always says…”	A slight impression of the Professor	“There isn’t a pickle a song can’t fix.”